Feb 25 2008
Beneath the Stamp of Preeminence: A Student’s Take on the Big Blue Books
What makes a textbook preeminent in its field?
So far, I’ve used two “preeminent” textbooks, and while I have no idea what that word means to the mysterious committee of trained professionals wielding the power of the Stamp of Preeminence, I can tell you what the word means based on my own experience. Based solely on the two preeminent texts I have been assigned, I have formulated the following 10 criteria for achieving preeminent status:
1. The book must be written either by your professor, by the good friends of your professor, or by the former professors of your professor
2. The book must exceed 1,200 pages
3. At least 750 of those 1,200 pages must be law review articles placed specifically to confuse, rather than explain, the given subject (but that’s okay because the articles were written by the same category of chaps listed in #1, supra)
4. The book must cost no less than (US) $300. Used. (couldn’t find a currency translator, but I’m told $300 is a LOT of ngwee)
5. The book must have a new edition each year making it utterly impossible to use/purchase a used one
6. The book must be hardbound with a blue cover
7. The book must have at least four authors
8. The book must be light on case law and heavy on pages containing naught but sentences ending in question marks while failing utterly to provide any means by which to answer said queries (begging the question: if I could answer the questions, would I really need the course..?)
9. The book must be infinitely and preferably replaceable by the preeminent supplement which, if used instead of said text, will actually get you a better exam grade (…um…or so I’m told…)
10. The book must provide better use as all/any of the following: a yoga block; a paperweight; a giant coaster (suitable for parties); and/or a good bit of kindling for the fire (toasty!).
OK, how close was I to the real criteria??
Interestingly, of the 4 dictionaries sitting on my desk, neither Black’s Law nor Black’s Law Pocket Edition nor even the Official Scrabble Player’s Dictionary define “preeminence.” I had to resort to my $1.99 Webster’s New Pocket Dictionary to find that, in its view, “preeminence” means “outstanding.” (HA! HA, I say! What bloody rubbish!) However, this same dictionary defines “outstanding” merely as “prominent.” And on that basis, I suppose I understand how my books achieved their revered status. I mean, the things weigh a combined 40lbs and could easily double as body armor in most armed-combat situations, so they’re definitely “prominent.” So if that’s the standard, then I can see how they’ve achieved it.
But this is all just my analysis of “preeminence” as applied to legal textbooks. I’m curious if any members of the reading audience are on the mysterious committee charged with wielding the Stamp of Preeminence and, if so, whether you’d be willing to shed a little light into this dark, dark topic. Enquiring minds, empty wallets, and plummeting GPAs most decidedly want to know.
